before I Shut my eyes

I’ve been talking to ex-convicts day in day out, been listening to recordings night in night out, been detecting trends and patterns sometime here and sometime there. It is surprising how exhausted I feel after each session. An hour per person and I feel entirely drained, like the essence of life is being sucked out of me. I sat in Starbucks today, sinking into the couch, sipping Honey Orange Mocha, staring into space, watching people pass, gazing at the sky. All I register are colours, movements, shapes, nothing defined and concrete. It’s as if I were sitting inside a vacuum watching some form of life played out on a plasma screen with a glass panel separating the screen and my being. In my business these days, I feel more at ease and at peace though. I guess it comes with being clear about what I want, what I don’t, and ultimately forming more meaningful relationships with people who matter.