I think there are many things in life we don’t understand and every thing that we don’t—we try to rationalize. Most insecurities, fears, doubts, questions become rationalizations because it makes dealing with them easier when we think we know what’s going on.
I’m in between two worlds, if I could broadly simplify them- a world of disbelief and a world of belief. They could both be worlds of beliefs, just beliefs in different value systems. As I shuttle in and out of the academic space where being critical is the Prized characteristic, and where various notions are easily simplified into ‘social constructions’, it makes me all the more reflective. I don’t think I can win anyone over through reason or through argument and how could I possibly do so? It doesn’t take grand theories to be brandied around, a simple and logical argument leaves me mum.
I don’t have answers to many questions and I have many questions unanswered. I know some people roll their eyes when they hear words like “faith” being thrown around. To them, it is a ridiculous idea that weak people depend on for lack of belief in themselves, God's presence could just be collective effervescence. I just read a thesis about how religion is a tool of social control, as Karl Marx most famously said, “Religion is the opium of the masses”. Religion teaches you to be content with your lot and not to envy and that helps ex-convicts re-integrate. Believing that whatever challenge you go through is part of God’s plan in your life makes everything easier to handle. All that seems very smart and admittedly, there is a certain amount of truth in that.
With all that said, I find my faith being challenged all the time. It takes a bump, or several, to root myself deeper. Today I was broken and I started tearing during worship and I couldn’t stop but I was also comforted with the knowledge that God is with me. I know that when a conclusion is drawn this way, in such a personalized form, it doesn’t seem like any sort of closure because individual experiences put every banter to an end. How could one challenge another’s personal experience? If it is a flawed conclusion, let it then be a truthful one. Sometimes I am incredibly weary and I'm left feeling that I just don't know what to do. And it is always during these times when God sees me through and against all hope, I believe.
Work-in-Progress
[Hunting for a good quote]
Sunday, November 8, 2009
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6 comments:
This is why I found learning Sociology analogous to that of consuming the forbidden fruit of the knowledge of good and evil. It enlightens us to see both sides of the religion (or any other social institution) coin, becoming too critical to the point of being cynical. It leads us to celebrate agency at the expense of challenging structure in a bit to create the social reality that we want. Thats why I am starting to appreciate Durkheim. By amalgamating the interest of our self with that of society, we are free from the torsion of contradicting viewpoints, living with carefree childhood ignorance. Like the famous proverb, ignorance is bliss. But if I am everything to the world, I am nothing to myself. And the circular argument goes on. So I shall just act ignorant.
Woah how did you find your way here? : ) no but i disagree with you--even if you align your views with that of society's, there's no ONE view you can adhere to so you'd always be faced with multiple contradictions, wouldn't you?
-zq
funny as it may seem, im facing the same thing too. people ard me tend to challenge my religion, my faith. and the more i try to explain to them and defend God from what they make of Him, the worst it becomes.
But i realised, our God doesn't need any defending. Only until they experience his true presence, then will they understand.
: )
Life consist of a multiplicity of chaos and contradictions. Religion's role is thus to help people confront and deal with chaos. If not there would be no meaning and order in life.
-M-
chim - guan
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