There is a Fine Fine Line

Going to the theatre always sweeps me away.

I love the energy-charged atmosphere, the smell of parquet and cushioned seats, and being in a place where dreams are lived out and fulfilled. I love that one moment when the audience cheers and shouts, “Encore”, “Encore” like our lives hung on to just one final song, and that nothing else beyond the walls of the theatre matters.

And “Seriously Hossan” was nothing short of pure magical lyrical brilliance. Both funny and deeply personal at the same time, the songs captivated the audience. It is amazing, the way a song unfolds with lyrics that put breadths on hold.

Of the many songs he sang tonight, I especially like this one by Avenue Q:



There's a fine, fine line between a lover and a friend;
There's a fine, fine line between reality and pretend;
And you never know 'til you reach the top if it was worth the uphill climb.
There's a fine, fine line between love
And a waste of time.
There's a fine, fine line between a fairy tale and a lie;
And there's a fine, fine line between "You're wonderful" and "Goodbye."
I guess if someone doesn't love you back it isn't such a crime,
But there's a fine, fine line between love
And a waste of your time.
And I don't have the time to waste on you anymore.
I don't think that you even know what you're looking for.
For my own sanity, I've got to close the door
And walk away...
Oh...
There's a fine, fine line between together and not
And there's a fine, fine line between what you wanted and what you got.
You gotta go after the things you want while you're still in your prime...
There's a fine, fine line between love
And a waste of time.

"I'll bring You more than a song"

"Every action of your life reflects what you fill your life with. If you fill your life with newspapers, you will speak news. If you watch soap operas, you will speak soap operas. But if you are filled with the Spirit and you absorb yourself in His presence, you will seek Jesus and glorify no one but Jesus."

Centrepoint

The last week of June is here and this realization made me panic a little because it is alarming that half a year is over, just like that. There are little events documenting the turn of the year that I remember vividly: the Christmas candlelight service, filling up the Goals Card on a cab ride somewhere. I’ve come to dislike expressions such as, “It feels like yesterday”, “Time sure flies” because it makes me feel that I’ve been caught off guard once more, no matter how many weeks, months, half years I’ve been through, there is a perpetual re-surprise year after year about how time speeds by us.

As with the start and end of the year, the midpoint like Wayne suggested, marks a time of reflection. My handwriting on my Goals Card is neat and small, as though the neater it is, the higher the chances of reaching those New Year resolutions. There are some I’ve attained, most I’ve not, others I’ve become oblivious to. All of which I felt were realistic, doable and attainable when I filled the card.

With June slipping away, there leaves one and a half more months before a brand new academic year begins. I’m liking the way this vacation is rolling by, the travelling, the camp, BS, fruitful explorations, like today catching an assortment of films from morning to night and getting excited talking about them thereafter.

The funniest resolution I’ve made comes under “Leisure” which says “More time for Sports, Vacation, Hobbies, Sleep & Rest” where I’ve simply written: SLEEP EARLIER. A goal that I’ve neglected because I’ve completely forgotten that it was even made! And I sit here, the clock hands spell 5:30am, reading my notebook of sermon notes from last November all the way till now (something the hecticness of the semester would forbid), thinking that soon enough we’d be embracing a countdown to 2009 and I’d feel that “time flies” all over again.

something for everyone

Haphazard Rants, Nonrandom

I like the song “Any Other World” by Mika, especially the line “Say Goodbye to the world you thought you lived in." What speaks to me isn’t the reminder of disillusion, but the quiet revelation that in this globe we inhibit, in the same country that we share, in the created space we’ve formed for ourselves, we occupy such vastly different worlds.

But our worlds overlap, and they’re all subsets of one another’s universe.

At the Peranakan Museum today, I caught myself paying attention to the Monday afternoon crowd almost as much as I studied the artifacts. I found it slightly intriguing, because this museum visiting business is probably a break from everyone’s Monday routine. I began to subconciously categorize visitors into tourists and locals, wondering why they were here, what would their usual first day of the week routine otherwise be…Anyway, the museum is pretty good, a little too spanking new for authenticity though, but I guess its commendable effort for a start.

I think of Singapore as gradually building up to reach a certain tipping point where the arts would flourish (such an overused and tired phrase but still) and just explode. I got quite excited gathering all these brochures, looking at the different exhibitions, films, Substation Outreach programmes. There is definitely progress in the arts scene, we’re moving somewhere that’s for sure, how fast this progress is or will be continues to be a question.

Its encouraging that there is a bit more nurturing of talent, a little more space for artistic experimentation (yes, debatable as well, to me there is) and the like. I think what we need to cultivate is a culture of appreciation of the arts, which is sorely and sadly missing in this country. We need to turn a nation of shoppers and food hunters into individuals more in touch with their senses, with the subtleties of everyday living that is constantly being transformed into photographs, writings, plays, dramas. That would take a lot of time, wouldn’t it? I wonder if it would even happen. There are times when I feel that the more developed we get, the less we have in us. We might turn into pretentious lovers of the arts. In an undeveloped society (in purely economic terms), art, say the weaving of a hat from leaves, is being appreciated in every simple way that we have come to neglect.

Sociology acquaints me with the minority, the underdog. I like it that I constantly feel that I am finally being told the truth about things after twelve standardized years of education. My eyes are finally opened to the loopholes in the government, and I start seeing how little things like nationalism is constructed, etc. Then almost as naturally, with no one else to point fingers at, we “blame the gah-men."

Yet, there are so many things, sweet and unpretentious, that I love this country for. Endless complaints get to me sometimes, and I find myself thinking that people should go about getting things fixed. With that arises the accusation of not seeing things from their shoes, from their plight. I am well aware of the stickiness of social mobility, the viciousness of the poverty cycle, we all are. So what is left at the endof the day is this general sense of ambivalence, everyone seems to make sense in their own way. Put together, nothing makes sense.

Tonight, or at least right now, I am feeling that criticism comes so easily, cynicism is easy. We need to stop smirking all the time. We need some positivity and I am repeating that to myself.

Hard-boiled

Human beings are awfully fragile creatures, with raw emotions and void hearts. This is an observation and perhaps a fact. It becomes a fact when it is realized.

People are usually happy being with other people. In a group setting, there is always laughter and rarely tears. Such social dynamics naturally bring fourth the cheery self.

This is in sharp contrast with the lone self, it is almost like stepping into another pair of shoes and adopting a different persona.

When it is realized that there are few or zero others a human being can have a true conversation with, a real pouring of emotions, it is a scary thought.

This is different from a rejection of emotional dependency on others, but a sudden jolt that hits and registers the difficulty of forming a real dependency on other humans.

So afraid and frightened, human beings lean on the spiritual world.

If not, they just remain ignorant and choose not to realize.